Nervous silence quickly turned into laughter during Associated Students Inc.’s College Dating in the Age of Tinder event Tuesday night. Relationship expert Aesha Adams-Roberts kept it all the way real with students as she shared tips and spilled the tea on hookup culture, ghosting, commitment issues and sliding into direct messages.
“The number one problem with dating is that nobody’s doing it,” Adams-Roberts said. ”We’re hooking up because we don’t have social skills and we don’t have social skills because we’re hooking up.”
Dating apps such as Tinder and Plenty of Fish have made it easier and faster to meet and connect, but harder to actually date and talk in-person.
While senior health science major Ebony Blaine attended the event to receive extra credit for her communications class, she also hoped the event would shed light on healthy dating habits.
“I’m hoping it’ll highlight some of the issues that come up with social media dating as a millenial which is different and awkward especially in your twenties.” Blaine said.
While some students had more personal reasons for attending, others saw the event advertised on campus and wanted to know how they could apply it to their professional lives.
“I work in housing here and some of the conflicts we find come from social media and relationships are often affected by social media,” Dennis Johnson said. “Since I’m not on social media I wanted a better perspective.”
Adams-Roberts stressed the importance of pressing pause on the relationship we have with our phones. Instead she proposed the idea of being comfortable sitting in silence and being present with one’s self.
“People don’t fear missing out, but fear that a better option is just a swipe, like or DM away,” Adams-Roberts said.
Attendees were asked to participate in a three-minute mindfulness exercise where they were asked to notice any tension and address any underlying emotions.
The event was preceded by a 30-minute Q&A with the audience. Attendees passed the mic around and asked the love doctor whatever their hearts desired.
“After hearing her speak I feel relief.” said Chloe Weatherspoon, communications major. “I’m glad she touched on standing up for our wants and desires and having conversations about them and the importance of knowing an unhealthy relationship when you’re in one and your personal boundaries.”