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From burned out undergraduate to eager grad student

During my early days at Long Beach State, I was a pre-graphic design major with a “C’s get degrees” mindset, just trying to power through my undergraduate career so I could earn a bachelor of fine arts.

Graphic design was appealing because I had prior experience and it felt like a financially practical application of my lifelong hobby, art.

Between the hours-long studio art classes on Zoom and nights spent staring at Adobe Illustrator with burning eyes, I soon discovered that graphic design was not the compromise I thought it was. I had not found the perfect intersection of practicality and creativity. Instead, I had turned art into a chore.

In the meantime, I was taking all of my required GEs. One of those courses was Introduction to Philosophy, one of the first classes I took in person as COVID-19 restrictions were lifted.

Studying philosophy in this introductory course sparked a passion in me that I had not yet experienced in undergrad. I could not believe the diversity of literature and subject matter within philosophy and I found myself enamored with it all.

Before I even finished the course, I arranged to minor in philosophy on top of my art degree.

In the process of taking more philosophy courses, I noticed I was much more motivated to study the material and perform well. My grades improved and I was having trouble choosing between philosophy courses because I wanted to take them all. This was a stark contrast to graphic design, where I was just trying to finish as quickly and easily as possible.

With the mentorship of faculty and advisors, I decided a degree in philosophy with a minor in graphic design felt the most true to my interests and goals. I also added a minor in photography, which I cannot recommend enough at CSULB.

I had always been someone who loved school, especially writing. When I started at CSULB, I wondered if the part of me that loved school so much was gone. However, once I became a philosophy major, my passion for learning was rekindled and I knew I didn’t want to be done after getting my bachelor’s degree.

What really affirmed my choice to pursue the philosophy graduate program at CSULB was working as an undergraduate research assistant under a professor in the department. This job not only gave me invaluable research skills, but also showed me that I enjoy doing research as a full-time job.

Additionally, I got to know graduate students in my department and spoke to multiple faculty members about their experiences in graduate school and advice for the future. Networking is as important as they say it is, which can initially be a painful truth if you are introverted like me.

With my end goal being a doctorate in philosophy and a stable job as a professor, I’m aware that the job market is competitive and academia is by no means a practical choice. I am extremely grateful to be in a position where I can take that risk.

Fully aware of the culture within academia as a philosopher, I have to at least try to pursue the path that will be the most fulfilling for me. I don’t want to spend the rest of my life wondering about what could have been.

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